I love being in love – the idea of it, the concept, and most definitely the feeling. Sometimes, I think I was made to love, because what else would I do with it all swirling inside me? It’s taken a bit of time to figure out exactly what it is. Only recently, I had the privilege of experiencing the first breakup that actually meant something to me, which really helped put everything into perspective.
I believe falling in love gives you a meaning that you hadn’t always considered, because suddenly – mid fall – you’re not considering yourself. At least, that’s how it was for me; it was the most selfless I’ve ever been. It may seem romantic to let yourself fall so freely for someone, but it can prove dangerous to be so inconsiderate of where you might land.
To love someone right, you have to know what you want, because finding yourself become selfless to the point where you disregard your own needs is a sure way to end up upset.
I fell in love, properly, when I was on the brink of 19 and not quite sure of myself and what I wanted. I’ve gotten to know myself and my needs much better since – but having been in that relationship, I had the added bonus of being loved in the process. And how lucky that was. Regardless, it was time that made me much surer about who I am, what I’m doing, what I need and where I am going.
Remove the idea that someone you love will complete you, rather embrace the idea of someone loving you – completely. Be transparent with your love, behave as it exists, and settle for no less than a 50/50 divide of this transparency – it’s what everyone deserves.
I’m so grateful to have given as much as I did, as openly as I did, and to have been loved as I was. A first love like that, despite the pain and emotional turmoil it brought at times, became a learning experience that is so vital to share.
Though I love Love, you won’t catch me blindly falling for anyone now, not at least before I catch myself – now that I know more so what I’m looking for. But Love makes even the smartest person dumb; you’ll know it when you feel it. Then, it’ll be time to address the elephant in room which is the question: Are You Ready?
Love isn’t something you can rush, and you certainly shouldn’t rush into it. Instead of spending your time worrying about finding your person, work on becoming secure in who you are and everything that comes with that – because no-one is going to do it for you.