8. The grass was never greener.

When you compare yourself to others, you’ll always fall short, because you’ll fail to acknowledge the things that aren’t surface level. You only see people that are supposedly better off than you when they’re shining bright. Well, better had put your sunglasses on because that shine is nothing but a trick of the light.

Trust me, when you think others have it better than you, they don’t. During sixth form, I became friends with a girl who had a job and a boyfriend. It seemed like she had her whole life together and she seemed happier for it. I decided it was about time I did the same and a month or so later, I too had a job and a boyfriend.

I didn’t know how this girl did it. I hated being a waitress alongside my studies, it completely stressed me out and made me dread waking up – also having a boyfriend was meh. Although I now had everything she had, I was not happier – but entirely burdened.

As soon as I got rid of both things, I felt free again. Free to be me as I was before, yet somehow more grateful. Later down the line, I found out she also hated her job, and her boyfriend was, in fact, a racist prick who she eventually dumped. At a glance, seeing others have what you think you need will leave you feeling less than, or that you’re missing out. Know that this is far from the truth; do things for the right reasons – do them for you.

Of course, you can take inspiration and motivation through the surface level lives of others, but don’t let it pick and chisel at the progression of growing into yourself (which is ultimately harder to avoid when you’re young.)

Much earlier, as a child, I began guitar lessons. It was something I adored until I was told I had to be the best before anyone else my age – so I had something to be truly proud of. From then, each lesson, each practice and every exercise became such a chore. After some time and a couple certificates under my belt, I grew a backbone and quit the lessons I so despised. No longer did I have to play pieces I found boring, for an audience I didn’t care about and for a reason I didn’t like. I still play today, but on my own terms and only ever for fun.

You’ll never be happier in someone else’s shoes; there’s a reason you have your own pair. Be content with where you are and the progress you are making in your own life because that is something to be proud of, for the grass was never greener.

You’ll never be happier in someone else’s shoes; there’s a reason you have your own pair.